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Some Stunnigly Hilarious One Liners

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

8 Effective Cold Prevention Strategies

 

 
 
1. Wash your hands - The world we live in is filled with viruses and bacteria that can make us ill. Your hands are no exceptions. Wash your hands often to keep them clean. If you cannot wash them, at least use some hand sanitizer, such as Purel.
 
2. Drink hot fluids, especially in the morning - The rhinovirus incubates in the back of the throat and spreads in the upper respiratory area because it's cooler than the body temperature. Rhinovirus can't survive at 98.6 (hence it doesn't travel far down into the bronchi or the lungs). By drinking hot fluid (such as hot tea and lemon) you can prevent the virus from incubating.
 
3. Keep your hands out of your face - We have already discussed the germs and viruses on your hands. You cannot wash them continuously, so in between washings keep your hands out of your face. Your face is an open portal to your insides. Keep the germs away from your portal.
 
4. Drink water - Drinking more water is my answer to everything. Water will help clean out your body and keep it clean. It will also keep your body functioning at 100%. You should drink at least (eight) 8oz glasses of water everyday. This will also help you lose weight.
 
5. Eat your fruits and vegetables - There are phytochemicals and antioxidants in fruits and vegetables that can help strengthen your immune system and prevent diseases. You should eat at least four servings of vegetables and two servings of fruits every day.
 
6. Multivitamins - If you are not eating all of your fruit and vegetable servings, you should take a multivitamin to ensure you are getting all of the vitamins your body needs to function properly. Take a simple one-a-day multivitamin everyday.
 
7. Stay warm - Being cold weakens your immune system and makes your body more susceptible to illness. Look at the day's temperature at weather.com before leaving your home. Wear layers in and out of your home when it is cold.
 
8. Relax and rest - Stress weakens your immune system. You can reduce your stress levels by relaxing and getting more sleep. Sleep is essential to maintaining a healthy immune system. Sleep will also boost your recovery time if you become ill.
 
Getting a cold can derail your nutrition and activity plans. However, if you follow the strategies I laid out for you, you can prevent this from happening.
 


 

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    ID theft in a Hotel via their card key...Caution!!




    Always take a small magnet on your holiday, they come in handy at the end of it.
    Thought you all needed to know this
     


    This is pretty good info. Never even thought about key cards containing anything other than an access code for the room! 

    HOTEL KEY CARDS
     
    Visit Us @ www.Fropki.com

    Ever wonder what is on your magnetic key card? 

    Answer: 
    a. Customer's name 
    B. Customer's partial home address 
    c. Hotel room number 
    d. Check-in date and out dates 
    e. Customer's credit card number and expiration date! 

    When you turn them in to the front desk your personal information is there for any employee to access by simply scanning the card in the hotel scanner.. An employee can take a hand full of cards home and using a scanning device, access the information onto a laptop computer and go shopping at your expense. 

    Simply put, hotels do not erase the information on these cards until an employee reissues the card to the next hotel guest. At that time, the new guest's information is electronically 'overwritten' on the card and the previous guest's information is erased in the overwriting process. 

    But until the card is rewritten for the next guest, it usually is kept in a drawer at the front desk with YOUR INFORMATION ON IT! 

    The bottom line is: Keep the cards, take them home with you, or destroy them. NEVER leave them behind in the room or room wastebasket, and NEVER turn them into the front desk when you check out of a room. They will not charge you for the card (it's illegal) and you'll be sure you are not leaving a lot of valuable personal information on it that could be easily lifted off with any simple scanning device card reader. 

    For the same reason, if you arrive at the airport and discover you still have the card key in your pocket, do not toss it in an airport trash basket. Take it home and destroy it by cutting it up, especially through the electronic information strip! 

    If you have a small magnet, pass it across the magnetic strip several times. Then try it in the door, it will not work. It erases everything on the card. 

    Information courtesy of: Metropolitan Police Service.


    PLEASE FORWARD to family & friends
    .

    7 websites to make you seem more interesting than you are

    So you checked. You don't suffer from halitosis, no body odour problems, and you're not even bad-looking , but you just can't seem to make any breakthrough with people at social gatherings. Why? Well, it's probably because you're bad at conversations. You don't know where to begin, and when you do, you mostly don't have anything interesting to say.

    Mostly, you're the person nursing a drink at the periphery of a party conversation, nodding sagely, at least that's the look you've been going for so far. But why stand at the edge when you can be bang in the middle of all the action; holding court, narrating anecdotes, and generally just appearing well-informed on anything and everything.

    Here are seven websites, equipped with which, you can appear intelligent to almost anyone. Well, not everyone, but at least it's a start...

    www.thefreedictionary.com

    This resource is one of the best places in Cyberia for any information of any sort. Besides dictionaries in English and 13 other languages, the site boasts of a thesaurus, a section for abbreviations, idioms, an encyclopaedia, as well as a literature reference library, and all supported by a nifty search engine. Daily visitors can also expect regular features such as word of the day, quote of the day, article of the day, this day in history, and so on. But my personal favourite has got to be the word game section , which includes Hangman and Spelling Bee. But I digress. Equipped with this resource, you can wax eloquent on practically anything under the sun.

    www.acronymfinder.com

    Every now and then, someone might try to appear smarter by spewing out an acronym or abbreviation at you with a condescending smirk. But if you have bookmarked Acronym Finder in you browser, that's one less tactic they can use to make you feel stupid. Now, while it won't keep you informed about everything there is to know, at least it will help you mitigate your losses. This site has more than 7,50,000 'human-edited' definitions, abbreviations and acronyms about computers, technology, telecommunications, and the military. So bookmark it ASAP before people start ROTFL at your ignorance.

    www.etymonline.com

    This site is all about polishing you into a fairly decent wordsmith. You know you can't have a conversation without being equipped with the right linguistic skills. Also, it always helps to know the root of words so you don't trip while trying to appear smart. Enter Etymonline. This resource will help you understand the origin, development, and the 'true sense' of a word. In simpler language, if you need to know the basis of any word in English, then this is the place to go to. Heck, it even covers "supercalifragilisticexpialidocious" . You might want to look that one up while you're at it.

    www.biography.com

    Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, small minds discuss people . But how will you ever discuss people, if you know nothing about them? I suggest you make haste to this resource. Whether it's Pope John Paul II or Martin Luther King, Adolf Hitler or Winston Churchill , Genghis Khan or Alexander the Great, Princess Diana or Marilyn Monroe , you'll find all their biographies here; complete with photographs, videos snippets, etcetera. And on those nights when you don't have any social invites, visit Biography.com anyway. It definitely makes for interesting reading. True story.

    wolframalpha.com

    How do I put this mildly without sounding like a fanboy? Wolframalpha is a search engine with a difference. Enter your birth date as a search parameter, and the engine will throw up details like the number of years, months and days you have spent on this planet; famous personalities that were born on the same day; the phase of the moon on the day you were born, etc. Enter in a colour, say 'pink', and it will throw up its RGB value, its hexadecimal code, complementary colours and the like. But don't take my word for it, go on, type in Mumbai and Tokyo in the box, and see what you get. Useless facts and statistics can be a great conversation opener.

    www.pantheon.org and www.theoi.com

    Everyone likes a story, and mythology has always a good subject to mine for conversations . So for your fill of gods and demons, check out Pantheon.org and Theoi.com; both excellent places to start. While the latter only covers Grecian divinity (and does it exceedingly well), Pantheon includes mythological characters from across the globe: From our own Ganesha to the Greek Zeus, the Roman Jupiter to the Nordic Freya, from the Egyptian Anubis to the Aztec Quetzalcoatl. The gods, it seems, have made these two URLs their personal domain. So if the exploits of the gods has always been your Achilles' heel, then this site is your river Styx. Take a dip.

    www.brainyquote.com

    So you've tried a few Siddhuisms, and you've managed to get a few guffaws out of your soft-headed friends. But now it's time to up the ante. If you're looking to impress people with higher IQs than your cronies, you must take recourse to BrainyQuote. The site is a repository of quotations from humourists, playwrights, presidents, authors, humanitarians and practically everybody who is anybody. Like someone famous said and I don't remember who, but you'll probably find the quote on the site itself: "Next to being witty, the best thing is being able to quote another's wit". I agree.

    Perception: Women Vs Men

     

    Women Friends chatting in office.
     
    Woman 1: I had a fine evening, how was yours?
    Woman 2: it was a disaster. My husband came home, ate his dinner in three minutes and fell asleep in two minutes. How was yours?
    Woman 1: Oh it was amazing! My husband came home and took me out to a romantic dinner. After dinner we walked for an hour. When we came home he lit the candles around the house and afterwards talked for an hour. It was like a fairytale!

     
    At the same time, their husbands are talking at work.
     
    Husband 1: How was your evening?
    Husband 2: Great. I came home, dinner was on the table, I ate and fell asleep. It was great! What about you?
    Husband 1: It was horrible. I came home, there's no dinner because they cut the electricity because I hadn't paid the bill; so I had to take my wife out to dinner which was so expensive that I didn't have money left for a cab. We had to walk home which took an hour; and when we got home remember there was no electricity so I had to light candles all over the house! After all, I was so aggravated that I couldn't fall asleep and my wife was jabbering away for another hour!

     

    Bananas... This is Very Interesting

     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     

    English - A Crazy Language,Must read

     

     

    We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
    But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes.
    One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
    Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
    You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
    Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
     
     
    If the plural of man is always called men,
    Then shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
    If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
    And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
    If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
    Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?
     

    Then one may be that, and three would be those,
    Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
    And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
    We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
    But though we say mother, we never say methren.
    Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
    But imagine the feminine: she, shis and shim!
     

    Let's face it - English is a crazy language.
    There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;
    neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
    English muffins weren't invented in England .
    We take English for granted, but if we explore its paradoxes,
    We find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square,
    And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
     

    And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing,
    Grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
    Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend.
    If you have a bunch of odds and ends
    And get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
     

    If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
    If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
    Sometimes I think all the folks who grew up speaking English
    Should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.
     

    In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?
    We ship by truck but send cargo by ship.
    We have noses that run and feet that smell.
    We park in a driveway and drive in a parkway.
    And how can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same,
    While a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
     

    You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language
    In which your house can burn up as it burns down,
    In which you fill in a form by filling it out,
    And in which an alarm goes off by going on.
     

    And, in closing, if Father is Pop, how come Mother's not Mop?
     

    And if people from Poland are called Poles
    Then people from Holland should be Holes
    And the Germans, Germs.
     

    And let's not forget the Americans, who changed s to z, but that's another story.

    Drink Water on Empty Stomach (Must Read)


     

     
     
    Headache, body ache, heart system, arthritis, fast heart beat, epilepsy, excess fatness, bronchitis asthma, TB, meningitis, kidney and urine diseases, vomiting, gastritis, diarrhea, piles, diabetes, constipation, all eye diseases, womb, cancer and menstrual disorders, ear nose and throat diseases.
     
    METHOD OF TREATMENT
    1. As you wake up in the morning before brushing teeth, drink 4 x 160ml glasses of water
    2. Brush and clean the mouth but do not eat or drink anything for 45 minutes
    3. After 45 minutes you may eat and drink as normal.
    4. After 15 minutes of breakfast, lunch and dinner do not eat or drink anything for 2 hours
    5. Those who are old or sick and are unable to drink 4 glasses of water at the beginning may commence by taking little water and gradually increase it to 4 glasses per day.
    6. The above method of treatment will cure diseases of the sick and others can enjoy a healthy life.
     
     
    1. High Blood Pressure (30 days)
     
    2. Gastric (10 days)
     
    3. Diabetes (30 days)
     
    4. Constipation (10 days)
     
    5. Cancer (180 days)
     
    6. TB (90 days)
     
    7. Arthritis patients should follow the above treatment only for 3 days in the 1st week, and from 2nd week onwards - daily.
     

    This treatment method has no side effects, however at the commencement of treatment you may have to urinate a few times.
     
    It is better if we continue this and make this procedure as a routine work in our life. Drink Water and Stay healthy and Active.
     
    This makes sense .. The Chinese and Japanese drink hot tea with their meals ..not cold water. Maybe it is time we adopt their drinking habit while eating!!! Nothing to lose, everything to gain...
     
    For those who like to drink cold water, this article is applicable to you.
    It is nice to have a cup of cold drink after a meal.  However, the cold water will solidify the oily stuff that you have just consumed. It will slow down the digestion.
     
    Once this "sludge" reacts with the acid, it will break down and be absorbed by the intestine faster than the solid food.. It will line the intestine.
    Very soon, this will turn into fats and lead to cancer. It is best to drink hot soup or warm water after a meal.
     
    A serious note about heart attacks:
     
     
    * Be aware of intense pain in the jaw line.
     
    * You may never have the first chest pain during the course of a heart attack.
     
    * Nausea and intense sweating are also common symptoms.
     
    * 60% of people who have a heart attack while they are asleep do not wake up.
     
    * Pain in the jaw can wake you from a sound sleep.. Let's be careful and be aware.. The more we know, the better chance we could survive...
     

    A cardiologist says if everyone who gets this mail sends it to everyone they know, you can be sure that we'll save at least one life..

    CLEAN YOUR KIDNEYS IN LESS THAN Re. 1.00




     

     

     


     


     

    CLEAN YOUR KIDNEYS IN LESS THAN Re. 1.00

    Years pass by and our kidneys are filtering the blood by removing salt, poison and any unwanted entering our body. With time, the salt accumulates and this needs to undergo cleaning treatments and how are we going to overcome this?

    It is very easy, first take a bunch of parsley (MALLI Leaves) KOTHIMBIR (DHANIYA)and wash it clean

    Then cut it in small pieces and put it in a pot and pour clean water and boil it for ten minutes and let it cool down and then filter it and pour in a clean bottle and keep it inside refrigerator to cool.

    Drink one glass daily and you will notice all salt and other accumulated poison coming out of your kidney by urination also you will be able to notice the difference which you never felt before.

    Parsley is known as best cleaning treatment for kidneys and it is natural!  


     Hope you will forward this to all you know

     

          

    Life Ke Funde.. He he he he..


     

    SEVEN FUNDAMENTALS OF LIFE FOR TODAY.
     
    1. Money is not everything. There's also Mastercard & Visa.
     
    2. One should love animals.They are tasty too.
     
    3. Save water. Drink beer.
     
    4. Studying is healthy, So leave it for the sick.
     
    5. Books are holy. So don't touch them.
     
    6. Love your neighbour but never get caught.
     
    7. Everyone should marry because happiness is not the only thing in life.